Welcoming 2025
Pain and joy await....
This is The Meadow, a place to create space for those seeking to be more fully awake and alive in the world.
Happy 2025! I have no idea what awaits us in this year, but I do know, if we keep our hearts open, that both pain and joy will cross the threshold of our hearts at different times. Will I remain open to both? Will you? That is the challenge. As one of my teachers, Joe Hudson, says, “Joy is the matriarch of a family of emotions. She won't come into your house if her children are not welcome.”
I did not send out Christmas cards this year, except to a few family members, and I didn’t receive but a handful of cards and no newsletters. I like hearing from friends I don’t get to see regularly, but I know this tradition is disappearing. When my spiritual director sent out an email update about his life, it deeply moved me—I had no idea of what he has had to deal with this year. It inspired me to write an update for my friends and to post it here too, for those who follow The Meadow. I would love to hear your take on the past year too.
For me, 2024 was a year of replenishing. I vowed to not take any big new projects, especially not any self-improvement ones. Instead, I focused on listening more, both to my own inner voice and to the quiet whisper of Spirit. My theme last year was “The Kingdom of Heaven is within you,” and that sums up the year for me. I meditated daily most days, even if just for 5 minutes, not to be holier or more enlightened, but just to quiet down and listen. And in the silence, after my inner chatter quieted down, I often felt grief, whether at the brokenness of the world or just the heartbreaking, but temporal, beauty of it all. And under the grief, sometimes there was stillness. And sometimes, even an open heart. It didn’t make me a saint. I still yelled at my kids, got irritated with my spouse and friends, scrolled on my phone too much, and ate junk food. But there was a bit more something—maybe room?—in me, a bit more acceptance for the imperfection and irritation in the day-to-day. A bit more pause that made space for dancing while doing dishes, or remembering to put my phone down more often and lie outside, looking up at the trees.
Other good things from 2024 include taking a few helpful online classes, going on a short day retreat, attending consistent counseling sessions, and working with a spiritual director as I wrestled with my faith. Family connections strengthened, and I lifted weights pretty regularly. Oh, I was prescribed a miracle migraine medicine (Qulipta) that has greatly improved the quality of my life.
Sorrows and struggles from 2024 include the death of my beloved cousin Danny, the election, health challenges, including a poor outcome of my hand surgery, not being able to find a decent high school for Ryan, Eri’s (formerly Aaron) challenges as a trans-woman in Florida, spending too much time on my phone, and not knowing whether I will get to keep my job due to post-tenure review.
2024 Fave Things
I love reading others’ “best of” lists, so I’m going to conclude this letter with some things that really brightened my year.
I read, watched, and listened to some beautiful, inspiring works this year. Some were just deeply entertaining (Moana 2); others had a significant impact on my life (Ninefold Path and the Substacks below). Here’s a sampling of highlights (that I can remember :-D).
Movies: Look Back, The Wild Robot, That Christmas, Inside Out 2, Moana 2. And…I just realized these are all animated films—I don’t even usually like animated films. These are all so good though. Look Back is a haunting, gorgeous anime about art and friendship that Eri shared with me.
Books: The Ninefold Path of Jesus: Hidden Wisdom of the Beatitudes, Way of Integrity, The Healing Light. And just for pure entertainment, I loved Sarah J. Maas’ A Court of Thorn and Roses series so much.
Poetry: Andrea Gibson’s You Better Be Lightning, David Whyte, and always, Mary Oliver.
Substacks that I follow and love: Nadia Bolz-Weber, Myles Werntz, Diana Butler Bass’ The Cottage, Humaning with Kelly Flanagan, and Letters from an American (of course!)
Podcasts I listen to regularly: We Can Do Hard Things and The Moth: Both give me such hope for humanity.
TV shows that captured my imagination or heart: Agatha All Along, Shrinking, Abbot Elementary
Apps that helped me be more of who I want to be in the world: Hallow (it leans right like most Catholic stuff lately, but it has some really excellent prayer, meditation, and scripture content, plus some audiobooks I love) and Insight Timer (love being able to schedule bells to chime during my meditation after a certain time).
I would love to hear what were your highlights in books, movies, TV, apps, podcasts, poems for 2024.
Looking Forward
So what’s resonating for 2025? For me, my word of the year is “maturity.” I’ve long prided myself on being childlike, and though that is still a big part of my identity, there is a sense that developing greater emotional/spiritual maturity is the next part of my journey. To me, this means a sense of inner dignity, staying the course even when things get difficult, and returning to my center, rather than being pulled into others’ drama.
I don’t have any big resolutions other than to keep meditating, keep moving, and eat more dark leafy greens. Oh, and to put my phone down much more. Screen time on iOS doesn’t help me—I just override it, so I found something much better: the Minimalist Launcher (iOS or Android). It makes my phone looks like the image below, and so, I don’t get the same dopamine rush when I pick it up anymore.
Sending each of you reading this my blessings for peace, joy, and connection as we face 2025 together.
With love,
Michele